Sins 2.0

The Catholic Church has updated the list of sins. According to the new list, you are a sinner if you harm the environment, deal with drugs or do stem cell research. Amusingly you are a sinner if you have obscene wealth.

No, what’s perhaps most amusing is that in this modern age, someone still feigns to have the authority to invent new sins in the first place, to perpetuate the inanity of the very concept, to torque and mold and reshape divine will as he sees fit, just sort of making it up as he goes along, expecting everyone to basically kneel and cower and kiss the ring. Is that not fabulous, in a hey-look-we’re-back-in-1328 sort of way?

And yes, I also enjoyed the new sin of excessive wealth, given how the Vatican is one of the most — if not the most — gluttonously wealthy organizations on the planet, oozing with real estate and massive stock portfolios, dripping with cash, billions of dollars in hoarded treasure and unknown gems, icons, art, the solid gold vaginas of 1,000 pagan goddesses locked up in its vaults. The hypocrisy is positively comical. Epic. Makes Eliot Spitzer’s trifle look like Mary Ann smoking a roach in rural Idaho.[Thou shalt not kid thyself]

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